DC CHRISTMAS PLATE or MAN, I AM GOING STRAIGHT TO HELL

I have a number of comments and observations pertaining to this issue.

Superman has a rather pleasant look on his face and is inviting Batman to come in.  Secretly he’s thinking, “Great Rao, Bruce, get that batarang out of your ass and join the Rao damn party.”

Why is Plastic Man giving Hal Jordan a back rub?

Plastic Man is also checking out Superman’s behind.  It’s why he wears the sunglasses, by the way.  That way he can just stare and stare and no one will notice.

Hawkman is not having a good time because Hawkman NEVER has a good time.

Hawkgirl is about five seconds from telling Carter that he needs to get the mace out of his ass and have a good time or so help her Ra she is leaving him and shaking up with Green Arrow.  She doesn’t care that Green Arrow is with Dinah because secretly Dinah’s into that kind of thing and Hawkgirl knows this.

Wonder Woman is enjoying herself because the pagan nature of the Christmas tree appeals to her upbringing.

Aquaman really wants to ask Zatana out.  Zatana doesn’t even know he’s alive.

Zatana…I really have nothing here.  Zatana is just having a good time and misses her Dad.  I mean he’s dead, right?  Has DC retconned that yet?

Captain Marvel doesn’t get any of the jokes that Ollie tells, but he laughs anyway so he doesn’t look like a dork.

Barry so wants to call him out on that.

Ollie is secretly thinking how awesome it would be to bag Hawkgirl and Black Canary at the same time and be part of a Pretty Bird Sandwich.

Dinah wants to leave Ollie for Hawkgirl.

What…in the hell…is Red Tornado drinking?

J’onn is on his fifth Manhattan and is getting to be a bit of a jerk.

Batman is thinking about how he is an orphan at Christmas time.  Because Batman is ALWAYS thinking about the fact that he is an orphan and everyone wants to tell him to knock that crap off but he has those files on how to kill them so they keep quiet and Batman really, really likes that.

Oh well, I think I’ve done enough today to ensure my place in Hell.  I swear my next two Christmas posts will be much more festive and not as snarky.

At least that’s the plan.

More to follow…

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3 Responses to DC CHRISTMAS PLATE or MAN, I AM GOING STRAIGHT TO HELL

  1. Poddinton says:

    Thanks Mike for another chuckle

  2. Michael Bailey says:

    Glad you like it, Poddington.

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