Last week my glasses broke.
There I was, sitting in bed, petting the dog and suddenly my lens pops out of my glasses. Surprisingly this was not too surprising. My glasses were nearing the end of their run and I knew this because the screw in the right side was getting progressively looser and every once in a while the lens would just…fall out. Why didn’t I get new glasses when this started? I have no idea. I’m like that. Until a problem is thrusting itself in my face I tend to ignore it. So the lens falls out, I sit up and realize that the lens popped out not because of the screw on the right side but because the frame snapped off at the top right near the bridge.
Crap.
With help from the wife the glasses were “repaired” and I was upset because I really didn’t have the money to get the situation fixed. That’s just how the situation is and I was rather…distraught. Rachel calmed me down and with the glasses somewhat in one piece I knew I could get through to this week when I could afford to get my eyes examined and new glasses.
Today I went to the optometrist and had my eyes checked out. I actually like this new eye doctor that I am going to. He was an affable guy who sat there and explained why I am kind of unlucky in the bad eyesight department. I am far sighted in one eye and near sighted in the other. This presents a certain number of problems mainly because my brain is constantly trying to focus and really can’t because things aren’t even which leads it to, every once in a while, tell my left eye to take a rest while it tries to sort things out. This causes my left eye to be “lazy”. I find it amusing that given my constant struggle with most issues and seeing all sides of said issues that even my eyes can’t agree on what to do.
So they had me look through the funky machines, they did the pressure test and then came my favorite part, the dilation of my eyes. A couple of drops and suddenly my eyes are tricked into thinking that it’s really, really dark. Boo yah. Everything checks out, though. My eyes are slightly worse than last time but nothing terrible until I’m forty apparently. I picked out a new pair of frames that closely resembled my current pair and looking through those frames drove home several points, the first being that my face is rather uninteresting and that glasses help this situation. It’s why I have facial hair, really. Well, that and my wife likes it and points and laughs when I shave it off claiming that I look like I’m 12. She wants me to grow a beard, but I have done so in the past and always felt that a full on beard makes me look like the type of guy that shows up on your doorstep one day to say, “Hey, yeah. My name is Michael and because of Meagan’s Law I have to tell you I moved in down the street.”
The other point is that there the a simple change in frame design means the difference between me looking studious and me looking like a complete and utter dork. Rectangular = fine. Round = where’s my pocket protector, yo? Seriously. It was kind of jarring. I mean I knew I couldn’t go “old man” nor could I get “stylish” frames because, well, that’s just not me. I’m a simple soul. Flashy only describes a certain portion of my comic book collection. Sure I have this thing for button downs that look like David Banner should be taking them off a laundry line, but still. I was amused by the whole thing really, but still. Weird.
While they were checking my eyes and playing tricks on them one of the guys tried to further fix my glasses, which failed miserably. The glasses finally broke beyond repair, so I am without glasses until the new ones come in. This added to the several hours where bright light and focusing were damn near impossible and I wasn’t in the best of moods today.
I really don’t know how this is going to affect my posting here this week. Staring at the computer screen is proving…difficult. Annoying really. I wanted to get a lot more done this week, but I don’t know how well that’s going to work out. I mean this post is turning out kind of long and I am regretting that the more I type. So I don’t know how loud or quiet I’ll be this week. Thought y’all might like the heads up.
More to follow…at some point…